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Raw Report for Dec. 10 - A Taste of TLC

Sean Balfour / December 11, 2012 - 11:51am

Raw begins with a brief recap of the Shields recent attacks, and the knee injury that caused the re-booking of TLC’s main event.

The Show opens live with Dolph Ziggler standing atop a ladder.  He says he’s on top where he belongs.  He says that TLC is like Christmas for John Cena because he continues to lose his title opportunities and is handed new ones.  Ziggler says that he will be the coal in Cena’s stocking.  He says that he’s going to cash in on Sunday and beat the Big Show for the title.

This brings out Sheamus.  The Mediocre White is all smiles as he cracks jokes about Ziggler’s height.  He says that if Ziggler wants to cash in his briefcase, it will be against him.  He points out that he doesn’t think that Ziggler can beat Cena, and he predicts Sheamus vs. John Cena for the World title.

Big Show comes out and calls all the talk boring and delusional.  He says that he would love to come to the ring and beat up Sheamus (or make love to him) but his no contact clause prevents it.

Sheamus cracks some terrible joke about Show’s testicles being chestnuts…oh right, its Christmas time…almost forgot. Sheamus says that just because he can’t have contact with Big Show, doesn’t mean he can’t have contact with someone else.  He proceeds to dump Ziggler off the ladder and over the top rope (kind of a nasty bump)

A raw active poll asks which of the two matches people would rather see, Big Show vs. Sheamus or Ziggler vs. Cena (I guess they want to find out what they should put on last!)

McMahon is in the arena and heading to the ring.

At the announce table after the break are Kofi and Antonio Cesaro.  Wade Barrett is in the ring awaiting some action, but Vince McMahon comes out!

He apologizes for interrupting and announces tonight’s main event, Big Show vs. John Cena.  He brings out Vickie Guerrero and coerces her into making another match, Sheamus vs. Dolph Ziggler.  He also announces AJ vs. Vickie.  This is the least impactful I can ever remember McMahon being on TV.

MATCH # 1 WADE BARRETT vs. R TRUTH

Kofi and Cesaro debate their skill sets.  Cesaro calls the high flying and singing and dancing repulsing.  Kofi makes fun of Cesaro’s “purse” (he’s holding his own in this).  In the ring, Barrett hits a stiff kick and sets up for a pump handle slam but Truth reverses into a roll up and gets a surprising pin.

Winner – R Truth

After the match Kofi hits a cross-body off the top onto Barrett.

This was a pretty effective segment to set up both matches in a short period of time.  It’s not going to sell a PPV but it certainly will add to the over-all intrigue.

In the back, AJ is super excited about her match with Vickie, telling all the Divas as she passes by.  She makes her way to the men’s locker room (possibly the baby face side) and finds Cena, giving him a big hug.  Cena ushers her out of the locker room as he mouth’s “I’m sorry” to the forth wall and what I can only imagine is a long line of wangs.

MATCH # 2 PTP vs. THE USO’S vs. PRIMO & EPICO vs. RHODES SCHOLARS

That’s right, Cody is back.  I’m not sure if this is a good thing or not, cause Sandow was just starting to gain some traction on his own.  The winners of this elimination four way match will face Rey & Sin Cara at TLC in a tables match to become #1 contenders.

The Uso’s double team Epico early on, but Primo tags in and gets the upper hand. Epico hits a flying elbow. Jimmy hits a splash off the top as Jey spears Epico and Primo is pinned for the first elimination. (the names could be backwards…if you noticed, you have a problem and should get outside more!)

During the commercial break, one of the favoured teams was eliminated! Prime Time Players were double teamed with a super kick and a splash…and with three hours of TV I have to go to wwe.com to see this…spoiler alert, I’m not!

So It’s down to the Uso’s and Rhodes Scholars.  Sandow stomps on Jey.  I didn’t notice this but Cody has a small dirty moustache…the crowd see it and they start chanting “Cody’s moustache” very clearly.  Jimmy hits a running butt splash onto Cody.  Sandow gets taken out and they set Cody up for a splash off the top, but Cody runs up and tries to hit a suplex.  He is knocked back down but gets his knees up to block the splash and hits cross Rhodes for the win.

Winners – Rhodes Scholars

MATCH # 3 EVE vs. ALICIA FOX

Fox leap frogs Eve and attempts a roll up.  She hits a bridge suplex for a near fall. Fox hits a tilt a whirl backbreaker.  Eve drags her off the top rope and hits a neck breaker finisher for the win.

Winner – Eve

Eve brings in a photographer as she stands over her fallen opponent for a photo op.

CM Punk is on crutches as he makes his way out to the ramp.  Heyman holds the title as Punk grabs a microphone.  He says that it’s come to his attention that some people think that his injury is phoney, and it’s an elaborate scheme to dodge a match with Ryback.  He says that this is what happens when you work grueling days as champion for 388 days.  He replays the footage of how he was injured.

Heyman tells the fans that they are ticking him off by chanting “feed me more”.  He says that Punk is a legitimate champion, and he doesn’t have a stunt double like “The Rock”.  Heyman says that the champion is not complaining.  He says that unlike The Rock, Punk showed up.  Heyman says that Punk will defend the title against The Rock.  Punk says that some people want to have him stripped of the title but nobody could do it.  He points out a long list of people he’s beaten and announces that he will be at TLC to watch The Shield do to Ryback, what Ryback did to him.

MATCH # 4 DOLPH ZIGGLER vs. SHEAMUS

Sheamus works the injured leg of Ziggler (which is taped up after the bump he took earlier) Sheamus take the fight to the outside, hitting a sledgehammer fist.  Dolph hits a famouser off the steel steps and tosses Sheamus back in the ring and secures a headlock.  Sheamus sends Dolph into the turnbuckle to break the hold.  Sheamus misses a spear in the corner and hits his shoulder on the post.  Dolph goes for a cross body but Sheamus catches him and hits a fall away slam.  He clubs Ziggler against the rope and suplexes him back in the ring.  Both men go to the top, the crowd behind Ziggler at this point.  Ziggler trades blows and manages to hit a face plant off the top.  Sheamus attempts a clover leaf, but Ziggler gets to the ropes.  Sheamus hits an Irish curse for a near fall.  Ziggler ducks the Brogue kick and Ziggler hits Sheamus with a chair.

Winner – Sheamus

After the match, Ziggler gets the chair Brogue kicked out of his hands, and he escapes up the ramp.

In the back, Hornswoggle and Khali perform a back adjustment on Vickie.  Vince walks in says, “I thought this was supposed to be a family show” I guess he’s forgotten about all the horrible things he’s done over the years.

MATCH # 5 ALBERTO DEL RIO vs. ZACK RYDER

Since it’s a 3 hour show, Ricardo rolls his “Rio” more even longer than before…I want to fall asleep.

Ryder gets an early advantage with a headlock and a flapjack.  Del Rio comes back with a kick to the kidneys.  He starts kicking Ryder’s shoulder. Del Rio hits a messy backbreaker.  He claws Ryder’s face. Del Rio hits a northern lights suplex for a near fall.  Ryder sends Del Rio over the top rope.  He goes for the broski boot but Del Rio reverses it into a cross arm breaker for the tap out.

Winner – Alberto Del Rio

The Slammy’s take place next week, and it’s completely Raw active.  I say we all vote in Darren Young for superstar of the year…just to fuck with them.

MATCH # 6 AJ vs. VICKIE

There is no Ref yet…I smell a swerve.  Is it gonna be Brad Maddox? Or Tamina? It is Brad Maddox!  The crowd is on him right away with “you can’t wrestle”.  Maddox calls for the bell and Vickie attacks AJ from behind.  She pushes AJ around.  AJ gets worked up and tackles Vickie, attacking her and slapping her all over the ring.  Maddox won’t count the pin. Vickie rolls up AJ and Maddox fast counts her.  Vickie Skips away, mocking AJ, as Brad Maddox raises her hand atop the ramp.

Winner – Vickie

AJ throws a tantrum in the ring and starts throwing chairs. She rips apart the announce table and overturns a ladder.  For no reason she slaps Justin Roberts and storms out of the arena.

In the back, Cena tries to calm down AJ, and holds her in his arms…how cute.

MATCH # 7 ANTONIO CESARO vs. KOFI KINGSTON

Cesaro says that America has gone rotten.  He says that New Jersey is the epitome of that.

Kofi breaks out of an arm bar and tries for a leg sweep but Cesaro blocks it and applies a headlock.  He tackles Kofi.  Kofi leaps over him several times and hits a springboard fist off the top rope.  Kofi monkey flips Cesaro but he runs right into a boot.  Cesaro applies a bear hug and a gut wrench.  Cesaro hits a spine buster.  The story of this match is pretty much that Cesaro can use his power to block all of Kofi’s high flying antics.  Cesaro hits an uppercut to the back of Kofi’s head.  Kofi hits an SOS but Cesaro gets his hand on the rope. Kofi hits a boot and attempts a cross body but Cesaro catches him in mid aid and hits a back breaker and neutralizer.

Winner – Antonio Cesaro

This was a very good match.

Miz TV is next. It’s hard to believe that they are still doing this.  The stage is set on the ramp as opposed to the ring.  Miz calls Team Rhodes Scholars “the beardo and the weirdo”.  Sandow battles chants of “Cody’s moustache”. He re introduces Cody as his tag partner and best friend.  Rhodes talks down to Miz, saying that he spends his time reliving his main event days from 2 years ago.  Rhodes says that they are like Princeton University amongst a state of the densest people in the country.  Miz says “sorry Cody, I moustache you a question”.  He asks if Damien’s beard rubbed off on Cody.  Miz cracks some jokes about Rhodes Scholars not being able to beat Rey and Sin Cara.  Damien says that he’s not a very good host.  Miz asks Cody why Sandow didn’t visit him in the hospital, and that Sandow called Cody the Marty Jannetty to his Shawn Michaels.  Miz says that Cody will always be overshadowed by people like his father and his tag team partner.  Cody won’t listen to it.  He says that Miz’s show is mindless trash and the interview is over.  Miz calls their team “the pink and the stink”.  That’s not very PG.

AJ catches up with Cena.  She says that she wants to accompany him to the ring.  Cena says that it would be safer for her to stay back.  She agrees…yeah right!

Dolph Ziggler is on commentary for the main event.

MATCH # 8 JOHN CENA vs. BIG SHOW

Ziggler complains about Cena having countless opportunities.  Ziggler gives credit to Big Show and Sheamus for their battles, saying that he hasn’t found the right opportunity to cash in.  Show gets the early advantage.  He head butts Cena and splashes him in the corner.  Cena climbs on top and applies a sleeper hold.  Cena tries to lift Show on his shoulders but he collapses.  Cena counters a choke slam into a DDT.  Show hits a side slam.  Big Show spears Cena.  Big show hits an elbow, and slows the match down.  Ziggler is doing great on commentary, even putting over Cena and Show, while maintaining that he’s just a little bit better.  Cole is shocked when Ziggler points out that he enjoys the competition and he doesn’t know who to root for in this match.  Big Show tosses Cena into the barricade on the outside.  Show hits a Vader bomb.  Ziggler says that he looks forward to going toe to toe with the franchise and becoming the new franchise.  The star of this whole match is Dolph Ziggler!

Cena hits Big Show with a side slam and 5 knuckle shuffle.  Big Show choke slams Cena.  Cena hits the AA on Show and now both men are down.

The most controversial 3 man group comes out and attack Cena (not 3MB).  The Shield  assault Cena as Big Show remains laid out and Dolph denies having a hand in this.  Hell No come out for a fight and now Ziggler jumps in and fights Cena.  Big Show joins in the attack and Sheamus comes out to attack Ziggler (he can’t touch Show).  Cena puts Show through a table.  Chaos insues.  The Shield take control and Ryback comes out.  He throws a ladder onto all three men.  He follows up with a spine buster.  Raw goes off the air with Cole screaming look out as all 10 men battle all over the arena.

There were parts of tonights show that I thought were very effective.  Of course everything is just too long and drawn out, but the last segment, as well as Punk remaining present and focusing on The Rock, were both effective.  The in ring product was better than average tonight, and I thought that Cesaro & Kofi had a great match, and Ziggler & Sheamus was pretty good.  Even Cena and Show had a good match, but it was heavily improved by Ziggler who did a good job in putting everyone over.  This was also the best go home show in recent memory, and I thought there was an overall good job at promoting the card from top to bottom.  I always watch the PPV’s anyway, but this one, despite its challenges has got my interest in more than one match.

This Sunday is TLC and next Monday is the Slammy’s, here are my predictions & some odds!

Ziggler (+120) over Cena (-130)

Rhodes Scholars (-220) over Rey & Cara (+200)

Kofi Kingston  (even) over Wade Barrett (even)

Antonio Cesaro (-250) over R Truth (+300)

The Shield (-110) over Hell No & Ryback (+110)

Odds that Ziggler or Cena cash in this Sunday 1-1 (I think this is the time to do it since you’ve lost a title match anyway)

Superstar of the year?  Punk 2-1 Cena 2-1 Sheamus 3-1 Big Show 4-1 field 5-1

Match of the year? Taker vs. HHH 2-1 Cena vs. Rock 3-1 Punk vs. Jericho 4-1 Cena vs. Lesnar 6-1 Tensai vs. Ryback #1 9000-1 (make it happen people!)

Comback of the year? Jerry Lawler 1-300  anyone else 4000-1

Odds that AJ interferes in Cena and Zigglers match on Sunday 2-1

Odds that Dolph just acquired job security at the announcer desk long after he retires 1-1

Odds that Cody’s whole gimmick will now have to revolve around his moustache 1-1

Odds that Miz’ whole carrier will now have to revolve around Cody’s moustache 1-1 (sad but true)